Chinese O levels

Yesterday (Friday) was the release of my O level Chinese results.
Well, I wasn't looking forward to it at all.
I had to do Prelim 2 EL papers 1 & 2, get my Chinese O results, and then take my O level English oral.
I was so upset by the fact that I migh let my expected E8 (P) grade to ruin my English oral.
I was cursing the day for setting out to be such a bitch to me.
During my paper 2, I had twenty minutes of free time after finishing my paper slowly and doodling.
So I was praying, praying so hard for a pass.
I just want a pass to be eligible for JC.
Nothing more than that; for I knew my regular standards were F9-D7.
My Chinese teacher had urged me repeatedly to drop to Chinese 'B' Syllabus  a simplified version of The current Chinese syllabus.
I was contemplating to drop to B for a few weeks.
My friends told me to hang on to Express Chinese.
But I knew I could not do well.

In the end, I refused to drop. How could I? I resolved to do better, to surpass my Teacher's expectations and prove that I could do it.

But my motivation only lasted so long before it gave in to the daily rush of life.
I had other subjects to attend to; Amath was more important.


So I didn't even try.

I knew my teacher wished I had dropped. Perhaps it wouldn't affect her rating that teachers have.
Well, no point. I continued each day like before with no signs of improvement in my Chinese,
Because I just didn't do any thing about it.



Chinese oral came, and I was positive I did badly. I hesitated in my sentences and the examiners even translated my word from English to Chinese for me! The passage I got was lucky; there were no crazy hard words. Even then, I still could not read 40% of the words.
I walked out of the library (exam venue), a bitter resentment in my heart for not having done more.
But I knew it was too late.

My paper 1, I didn't write both numbers for my question choice.
My bzbd was always a borderline failure in class.
I did the sihan, which my teacher said was much harder than gonghan.
I didn't even know how to write gonghan.
I don't remember what the questions were but I know I walked out of the exam hall miserably as my classmates told each other the paper was manageable.
Hell, I couldn't even read some of the words for the questions in the essay segment!
I can never choose what questions to write for my essay; my limited Chinese vocab chose for me.
More often than not, I can't read a whole question fully, and have to make do with guessing.


Well, my paper 2 was no better. Alright, it was slightly better.
But I always do my compre first. If I do by chronological order, I would get angry and frustrated by the time I reached the compre segment as all the words would irritate me.

So I was dying and wanted to fall asleep by the time I started on my MCQs. Great.


As for my listening compre, it wasnt good as well. I had about 3-5 questions off from the Teacher's answers. Not that they're confirmed correct but yeah.


As you can see my journey was not pretty.

So I expected an E8. I was sad because I thought I wouldn't get F9, nor Do well enough to pass.
If I got F9, I could choose Chinese B syllabus.
But I didn't think I would fail that badly.
I thought, an E8. It wasn't good enough to pass. Neither was it bad enough to give me another option.


Wendy and poggy asked me, "so how? Taking results soon ley!" after the nd of my prelim paper.
I was groaning and telling them "don't need see alrd fail Liao la"

I was sick to my stomach at the thought of seeing in black and white, how much of a failure I was.



Well, mrs goh my emath teacher, walked past me and gave me a pedo smile.
Then she did the okay sign with her finger.

Sigh! Even my emath teacher knew how shitty I was that she had to console me?

In the end,
After all the time wasted on not studying Chinese and only hugging the Buddha leg during the weekend before my papers,
After all the four years in Chung Cheng basically being a failure in Chinese and never doing a single piece of homework by myself, only copying, getting kicked out of sec 1 Chinese class all the time,

I'M FUCKING GRADUATING WITH A B3 AND DISTINCTION FOR ORAL!!!!!

FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!!

-throws confetti-
When mrs goh spoiler and told me I got distinction for oral, i squealed like a gay and bounced up and down my chair!!!
I was like WHAT?!! I could hardly believe it!
Me? After using English?!

I need to faint!



My Chinese teacher patted me on the back and told me I did well.
It was the proudest moment of my day !!
After she told me to drop, over and over again, I still managed to get this result!!!!




I'm so happy!!!



Well, this would not have been possible if I did no have the support and encouragement from my friends such as my nooboser, Zhiyi, poggy, and well, special thanks to ....
Movin. He was the one who didn't give me pressure to drop or not and on my results day he asked how I dd and he was so happy for me! Thanks buddy :)

Of course, thanks to Kenny and Jessica too.

And thanks to my grandmother for making me spend the weekend with her doing Chinese.... HAHAHAAH



I'm overjoyed!



I might retake though.


Nonetheless yesterday was the greatest miracle of 2012.
I know I did not deserve such a result, and I am eternally grateful towards all the luck and people who have made this possible.

I am more motivated than ever do strive to do better for my other subjects.


:)